A Surprising Path to Mindfulness
Eli Susman, a dedicated meditator, embarked on a journey to deepen his meditation practice, traveling across the world to Plum Village, a mindfulness center in southern France led by Buddhist monks. His expectations of spending hours in deep meditation were turned upside down. To his surprise, the retreat only included 30 minutes of formal meditation per day.
After speaking with one of the monks, Susman had a revelation. The monk advised him that a mere three breaths could be enough to center oneself. This revelation prompted Susman to explore how short moments of mindfulness could impact well-being.
Three Breaths to Relieve Stress
Susman, a doctoral candidate in psychology at the University of California, Berkeley, conducted a study to test whether a 20-second practice of self-compassionate touch—physical acts of self-soothing—could offer similar mental health benefits to meditation. His research, published in Behaviour Research and Therapy, demonstrated that a brief session of self-compassionate touch reduced stress and increased feelings of kindness toward oneself.
The study builds on earlier research from 2021, where German researchers found that 20 seconds of self-compassionate touch could lower cortisol levels after stressful events.
How College Students Benefited from Daily Self-Compassion
In Susman’s recent study, college students were assigned one of two daily practices: self-compassionate touch or a control exercise involving finger-tapping. Participants practiced for just 20 seconds each day for a month. Those who practiced self-compassionate touch reported significant improvements in stress levels, self-kindness, and overall mental well-being compared to the control group.
According to Dr. Sanam Hafeez, a neuropsychologist from New York City, the findings are not surprising. She noted that daily self-compassionate touch proved highly effective, offering benefits comparable to long-term therapy. However, she cautioned that while helpful, it is not a replacement for traditional therapy, particularly for individuals with diagnosed mental health conditions.
How to Practice Self-Compassionate Touch
Self-compassionate touch can be practiced anywhere—whether at home, on a crowded train, or during a busy workday. Susman outlined a simple three-step process:
- Recall a Difficult Moment: Think about a recent mistake or time you felt inadequate. Focus on how your body feels when remembering these moments.
- Find a Comfortable Place to Touch: Place a hand over your heart or on your belly. Other options include stroking your neck, massaging your palm, or hugging your upper arms. Focus on the warmth and sensation of the touch.
- Show Yourself Kindness: Ask yourself, “How can I be a friend to myself right now?” Use this moment to practice self-forgiveness and acceptance. You can repeat the session as often as needed.
Making Self-Compassion a Habit
The study revealed that people who practiced this micro-moment of self-compassion daily experienced the greatest mental health benefits. Susman suggests making it a habit by tying the practice to a daily routine, such as brushing your teeth.
“It’s about offering yourself the same kindness and care you would a close friend,” Susman said. “It’s not about being perfect but learning to be kinder to yourself, even for just 20 seconds a day.”
As stress continues to plague modern society, this quick and accessible practice offers a powerful tool to improve mental well-being. So, next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a moment to be your own best friend, if only for 20 seconds.
